Pre-deployment retreats help increase Tinker family resiliency Published Sept. 30, 2011 By Charlie Lewis 72nd Force Support Squadron TINKER AIR FORCE BASE, Okla. -- Research shows deployments have damaged military marriages. Active duty divorce rates have increased significantly due, in part, to multiple deployments and the up tempo of deployments. To help combat this negative trend OSD has authorized the use of O&M funds to provide support services for chaplain-led programs to assist active duty members of the armed forces and their immediate family members in building and maintaining a strong family structure. The purpose of the retreat is to connect spouses to each other and their squadron support systems, organize helping agencies into a single and comprehensive deployment care system, provide for deployed opportunities to create shared memories that will relieve stress (pre- and post- deployment) and educate everyone how to strengthen (pre-deployment), sustain (mid-deployment) and find ultimate success (post-deployment) in all their important relationships. The cornerstone of Tinker Pre-Deployment Family Retreat is a three-day, two-night pre-deployment retreat designed to help Team Tinker and their families build some Kodak moments and solidify the foundation of their family. The retreat equips family members to deal with day-to-day situations while the active duty member is deployed. This preparation allows the deployed Airman to focus more clearly on the mission instead of distractions that come from a family in crisis. Tinker has held three retreats and each has grown and become bigger and better than the one before. The last retreat, held Aug. 26-28, by far has been the best to date. Fifty-seven families -- 98 adults and 120 children -- were able to engage in a more intimate and spiritual setting than a conference. The retreat was held at the National Center for Employee Development in Norman, which is a location apart from their normal workday and family life. The setting provided by NCED was conducive to strengthening family ties and connecting Air Force families who are dealing with the same issues of separation. One participant said the best part was "sharing a 'stress free' weekend with my children. That was awesome! Just spending time and bonding closer with family and all our free time was spent together." Twenty-four of the families commented they were able to build shared memories to reflect on during deployment. Thirty-seven of the families who attended felt there was relevant teaching to improving their relationships. Professional marriage and family counselors report that the No. 1 reason for marital problems is ineffective communication. The retreat helped spouses openly communicate and express feelings they would not normally share with each other in any other type of setting. At Tinker Pre-Deployment Family Retreats, Team Tinker professionals and volunteers work together to serve deployed families. By strengthening the bonds of cooperation among Tinker organizations and increasing their participation, not only have the retreats become more effective, the combined service of all Team Tinker organizations has been enhanced when returning to normal, day-to-day operations. Statistics show of the 2.2 million U.S. service members today, 58 percent have family responsibilities and 40 percent average two children per household. Tinker has made it a priority to ensure military members are equipped to ease some stress related with deployment by hosting a retreat every six months. So, mark your calendars for the next retreat, which is scheduled March 23-25.